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標題: 你會否因嫁錯郎／娶錯妻而離婚？ [打印本頁]

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 00:40 標題: 你會否因嫁錯郎／娶錯妻而離婚？

無論已婚未婚都可以齊齊討論下！

第三者唔計，各位會唔會因為「貨不對辦」，或者「以為自己接受到點知唔得」，如性格，背景等等，而要求離婚？有仔女同冇仔女會唔會有唔同答案？

投票係假設冇小朋友既情況之下。

[ 本帖最後由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 00:42 編輯 ]

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 00:45

我自己答會。雖然我冇gum既顧慮，但係我覺得除非拍拖好耐，或者相處過好close
如同居，如果唔係出現貨不對辦可能性都好高，而我係一個有expectation的人。

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 00:46

做乜無端端諗呢D野？

作者: kayllis 時間: 2009-3-4 00:51

erm.. what do you mean by 貨不對辦?

作者: mcjohnjohn 時間: 2009-3-4 00:56

係唔係之話如果娶左個老婆之後先發覺佢係人妖, 咁應唔應該離婚?

作者: kayllis 時間: 2009-3-4 00:58

that's probably a really extreme example la

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:00

人夾人緣，無話貨吾貨對辦既，拍拖無端端都會想飛人，但當你覺得另一半變左親人，好似老豆老母兄弟姐妹甘，甘就可以結婚law，離婚機會會細D

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:03

原帖由 mcjohnjohn 於 2009-3-4 01:56 發表
係唔係之話如果娶左個老婆之後先發覺佢係人妖, 咁應唔應該離婚?

所以婚前性行為係重要既

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:03

哈哈係人妖就即刻refund添啦！

hmm......譬如：
﹣好似Ｄ香港男人番大陸娶老婆，話比個女人知「我響ＨＫ有車有樓XXXXX」，點知嫁左去香港先知要住板間房

﹣拍拖時個男人就「萬事得」，結婚後就咩都唔得
﹣結左婚先發覺個老婆唔做野坐係屋企等運到

以上係其中一Ｄexample

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:06

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 01:00 發表
人夾人緣，無話貨吾貨對辦既，拍拖無端端都會想飛人，但當你覺得另一半變左親人，好似老豆老母兄弟姐妹甘，甘就可以結婚law，離婚機會會細D

我都同意，gum如果結左婚先發覺自己當唔到個另一半係親人呢？即topic所講「以為自己接受到點知唔得」

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:06

原帖由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 02:03 發表
哈哈係人妖就即刻refund添啦！

hmm......譬如：
﹣好似Ｄ香港男人番大陸娶老婆，話比個女人知「我響ＨＫ有車有樓XXXXX」，點知嫁左去香港先知要住板間房
﹣拍拖時個男人就「萬事得」，結婚後就咩都唔得
﹣結左婚先發覺個老婆唔做野坐係 ...

所以我讚成同居

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:07

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 00:46 發表
做乜無端端諗呢D野？

身邊有結左婚發覺唔夾而自己接受唔到的例子囉

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:09

同居先law，有得試用又無風險，common law 都可以分身家

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:12

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 01:09 發表
同居先law，有得試用又無風險，common law 都可以分身家

gum我都贊成同居，唉但係見到身邊Ｄ人有呢類問題，婚都結左咯，唔通同人地話「早知你就同居先呀麻」咩

rickrick你未入墳墓仲有得揀呀哈哈

[ 本帖最後由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 01:14 編輯 ]

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:15

係啊，佢地傻，你米吾好學佢地law

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:18

同居四五六年差吾多啦，有幾多條毛都清楚

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:20

但係做人老公老婆都要識做先可以長既

作者: mcjohnjohn 時間: 2009-3-4 01:20

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 17:18 發表
同居四五六年差吾多啦，有幾多條毛都清楚

數毛毛? 好浪漫啊~
同數星星有異曲同弓之妙~

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:22

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 01:15 發表
係啊，佢地傻，你米吾好學佢地law

嫁左啦，我冇gum既問題

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:25

原帖由 mcjohnjohn 於 2009-3-4 02:20 發表

數毛毛? 好浪漫啊~
同數星星有異曲同弓之妙~

係啊，得閑同你老婆數下

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:27

原帖由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 02:22 發表

嫁左啦，我冇gum既問題

冇gum既問題，但有gum既諗頭

你都得閑同你老公數下毛毛，增進感情

作者: kayllis 時間: 2009-3-4 01:29

原帖由 mcjohnjohn 於 2009-3-4 02:20 發表

數毛毛? 好浪漫啊~
同數星星有異曲同弓之妙~

hahaha.. you guys are so funny...XDD

i agree with living together first too..
there are lots of things that each other may not agree with...
if at the end they figure that they dont match...
at least one person can "ho siu sa" and bring all his/her stuff and leave...

since katamari said that the couples are married already..
maybe they should see if there are ways to solve the problem?@@
but then it really depend on what the problem is too..=o=

[ 本帖最後由 kayllis 於 2009-3-4 02:31 編輯 ]

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:31

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 01:27 發表

冇gum既問題，但有gum既諗頭

你都得閑同你老公數下毛毛，增進感情

話左假設性討論呀！你投入Ｄ啦！

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:32

原帖由 kayllis 於 2009-3-4 01:29 發表

hahaha.. you guys are so funny...XDD

i agree with living together first too..
there are lots of things that each other may not agree with...
if at the end they figure that they dont match...
at lea ...

yea, let's assume that something already happened la

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:34

原帖由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 02:31 發表

話左假設性討論呀！你投入Ｄ啦！

我仲吾投入???
今日活躍老友 #1 wor 我而家

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:36

即假設：

你係李Ｘ欣好恨嫁入許家點知許家Ｄ人對你好差，差到覺得許Ｘ亨比好多好多錢你使都隬補唔到個傷痛。

gum你嫁之前實以為自己實食冇痴牙架麻

[ 本帖最後由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 01:37 編輯 ]

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:38

原帖由 katamari 於 2009-3-4 02:36 發表
即假設：

你係李Ｘ欣好恨嫁入許家點知許家Ｄ人對你好差，差到覺得許Ｘ亨比好多好多錢你使都隬補唔到個傷痛。

即時離婚!!!!講笑啊，即分佢身家!!HOHOHOHO

作者: ricrick 時間: 2009-3-4 01:41

家下D人離婚當食生菜啦，洗乜愁？

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 01:42

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 01:38 發表

即時離婚!!!!講笑啊，即分佢身家!!HOHOHOHO

可能許老爺將Ｄ資產寫曬公司名問你死未！

作者: kayllis 時間: 2009-3-4 02:14

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 02:41 發表
家下D人離婚當食生菜啦，洗乜愁？

i agree ar...
people now days get marry and divorce easily...@@
which makes marriage so "yee hay" now...

作者: 小叻 時間: 2009-3-4 08:46

應該交往一段長時間先結婚~ 我唔太睇好拍拖一兩年就結婚個D囉~

作者: 布小熊 時間: 2009-3-4 10:20

拍拖 and living together is very diff. You can 拍拖 for 10 years and still find a person totally different after moving together.

作者: 小叻 時間: 2009-3-4 10:48

原帖由 布小熊 於 4-3-2009 10:20 發表
拍拖 and living together is very diff. You can 拍拖 for 10 years and still find a person totally different after moving together.

well..depends how they 拍拖 la.. just dating twice a week of coz different la.. but if they were together everyday for several years.. i think it does make a difference..

作者: 邊少 時間: 2009-3-4 10:50

seem like guys are more responsible than women

作者: fibbi 時間: 2009-3-4 10:54

我認為結婚之前應該傾下，了解下大家會點樣分擔家頭細務，例如，如果老婆煮飯嘅話，老公會唔會洗碗？邊個負責吸塵？女嘅會唔會想男方每次去完廁所都放翻塊板落嚟等等。講清楚婚後就不會有咁多誤會啦

作者: siumaibb 時間: 2009-3-4 10:57

原帖由 fibbi 於 2009-3-4 11:54 發表
我認為結婚之前應該傾下，了解下大家會點樣分擔家頭細務，例如，如果老婆煮飯嘅話，老公會唔會洗碗？邊個負責吸塵？女嘅會唔會想男方每次去完廁所都放翻塊板落嚟等等。講清楚婚後就不會有咁多誤會啦 ...

洗唔洗sign定contract先？

作者: 小叻 時間: 2009-3-4 11:03

其實洗碗﹐吸塵﹐去完廁所放翻塊板落等等都唔係太大問題者? 無話邊個要做邊個唔做~ 好簡單既事情~ 連依D都唔能夠忍讓﹐唔好結婚啦~
我本人覺得洗碗﹐吸塵都係老婆做好D~如果老公幫手就更開心啦~ 去廁所放翻塊板落﹐ 老公唔放自己方咪得囉~有乜問題wor~

作者: kayllis 時間: 2009-3-4 11:20

原帖由 fibbi 於 2009-3-4 11:54 發表
我認為結婚之前應該傾下，了解下大家會點樣分擔家頭細務，例如，如果老婆煮飯嘅話，老公會唔會洗碗？邊個負責吸塵？女嘅會唔會想男方每次去完廁所都放翻塊板落嚟等等。講清楚婚後就不會有咁多誤會啦 ...

i agree with you that communication is important before marriage la~~
but then... i think there are probably more important things to discuss about rather than who is going to do the housework...

i dont mean the ones you have mentioned is not important.. but in case if the couples couldnt find a solution... in worse case they can just hire a maid or something..=P

作者: Purpleheart 時間: 2009-3-4 11:21

從統計結果看來, 男人就算知道娶錯妻都唔會離婚.....原因是什麼呢?

女人覺得自己嫁錯郎就離婚, 是不是因為現今的女性都很理智呢?

作者: fibbi 時間: 2009-3-4 11:26

有好多時就係因為你認為我做，我認為你做，好多好似小事，積少成多，就會多咗拗撬。
大家拍拖嘅時候就係互相認識對方（主要係性格上），睇下夾唔夾，當然係認為夾嘅先會結婚，咁婚後又何來嫁錯／娶錯，拗撬通常都係來自啲好瑣碎嘅事，同埋錢。或者係生活習慣唔同，所以咪要了解下啲習慣，同埋期望囉。

[ 本帖最後由 fibbi 於 2009-3-4 12:28 編輯 ]

作者: fibbi 時間: 2009-3-4 11:38

原帖由 kayllis 於 2009-3-4 12:20 發表
....
i dont mean the ones you have mentioned is not important.. but in case if the couples couldnt find a solution... in worse case they can just hire a maid or something..=P

It's easier to say "hire a maid" to do housework than actually "hire a maid". Do you know the cost of the "maid" here? Can the couple afford the maid? It's not that easy, after paying mortgage, all household expense...not even mention the cost of kid (if there is any... If it's as easy as in HK (many family with Philipinno/Indonesian maid) life would be much easier here...

作者: 小叻 時間: 2009-3-4 11:45

原帖由 fibbi 於 4-3-2009 11:26 發表
有好多時就係因為你認為我做，我認為你做，好多好似小事，積少成多，就會多咗拗撬。
大家拍拖嘅時候就係互相認識對方（主要係性格上），睇下夾唔夾，當然係認為夾嘅先會結婚，咁婚後又何來嫁錯／娶錯，拗撬通常都係來自啲好瑣碎嘅事，同埋錢 ...

結婚前講話ok ﹐婚後做唔做到又係另一回事啦~

作者: 小叻 時間: 2009-3-4 11:47

最緊要都係性格﹐男女都要識得忍讓遷就啦~

作者: 邊少 時間: 2009-3-4 11:54

原帖由 Purpleheart 於 2009-3-4 12:21 發表
從統計結果看來, 男人就算知道娶錯妻都唔會離婚.....原因是什麼呢?

女人覺得自己嫁錯郎就離婚, 是不是因為現今的女性都很理智呢?

responsibility
which men usually have in mind if he is a good man
but good women dont need to have responsibility

好女人可以好任性唔理後果
好男人一定想有responsibility

[ 本帖最後由邊少於 2009-3-4 13:22 編輯 ]

作者: fibbi 時間: 2009-3-4 12:34

原帖由 Purpleheart 於 2009-3-4 12:21 發表
從統計結果看來, 男人就算知道娶錯妻都唔會離婚.....原因是什麼呢?

女人覺得自己嫁錯郎就離婚, 是不是因為現今的女性都很理智呢?

Any source of this statistics? I am actually quite surprise to see this. I don't think woman is that easy to say "divorce" as well.

作者: fibbi 時間: 2009-3-4 12:36

原帖由邊少於 2009-3-4 12:54 發表
responsibility
which men usually have in mind if he is a good man
but good women dont need to have responsibility
好女人可以好任性唔理後果
好男人一定想有responsibility

邊少 must be a guy....

"好女人可以好任性唔理後果" --> Then that woman is certainly not "good woman".

作者: Ultraman 時間: 2009-3-4 12:49

Since men are from Mars and women are from Jupiter (or the other way round), it's very common they have different needs in a relationship/marriage.
Say "sense of security", women might feel "lack of security" for some reasons, but to men they usually don't have this abstract term in their dictionary and so probably they have no idea what it is and how to comfort their women. Therefore, communication by open discussion/sharing and acceptance is very important.

On the other hand, usually men would have a stronger "sense of responsibility" than women. Generally, they have stronger sense to "take care of their women" in mind. And plus when men are more rational (not all men at all times), they don't see big problem in a relationship (unless a "3rd party" is involved).

Women could be rational and/or irrational. For example, a woman decides to leave her man because no matter how hard he's been trying to do, she can't feel the love of him, her decision of leaving him is irrational. A woman can't bear her man being layoff for years but still lazy to look for a new job and choose to leave him, this is rational.

作者: katamari 時間: 2009-3-4 13:00

唔知點解當我setup個poll時我都係估女仔答會既比例係大Ｄ喎！可能通常拍拖講分手Ｄ男仔都拖泥帶水Ｄ哈哈。不過我唔同意離婚＝任性唔理後果，尤其係當外人唔知情既時候。因為真係有Ｄ關係婚後差到外人都想勸離婚不過唔敢開口。

我好同意布小熊所講「拍拖 and living together is very diff. You can 拍拖 for 10 years and still find a person totally different after moving together.」唔係淨係話家務或者經濟上的問題，on top of those可能會出現其他分岐呀。

我覺得如果為左「係時候結婚而結婚」的人既關係會比「因愛對方而結婚」脆弱得多，嫁錯／娶錯機會係大好多。

假設，問題已變得無可救藥，除左離婚大家就只有活在痛苦之中。既然離婚＝任性，不過唔過唔離＝痛苦，gum你會唔會夠膽忍痛離婚，情願比人話你任性？

作者: 布小熊 時間: 2009-3-4 13:04

important Quote:
"Do not marry someone whom you can live with,
"marry someone whom you cannot live without"

作者: myversa 時間: 2009-3-4 14:14

原帖由小叻於 2009-3-4 09:46 發表
應該交往一段長時間先結婚~ 我唔太睇好拍拖一兩年就結婚個D囉~

I am one of those who got married within 2 years and I guess I am the lucky one so I cannot really tell you the answer to this question.

I do not think it's how long you two know each other; it's how well you two know each other and how well you two can live together.

Of course, I will never know the future but I will try my best to stay together.

作者: Nam 時間: 2009-3-4 14:25

I used to be a person who think once I'm in a relationship.  I will not break it and try to solve it or live with it unless I have no choice. (Especially long term relationship)

But as I grow older, to be with a person just because of responsibility is stupid.  You are not happy with that person, and that unhappiness tend to be there forever.  Why hurt each other and torture each other?

But of course, if there are children involve, I will live with it until my kids are old enough to take care of themselves.

BUT I do not agree to break it off easily, I will try to solve the problem and discuss with my other half before I make the decision.  If I spend years try to save a relationship and it's still not work out.  Why waste each other time?

作者: 邊少 時間: 2009-3-4 15:32

原帖由 fibbi 於 2009-3-4 13:36 發表

邊少 must be a guy....
"好女人可以好任性唔理後果" --> Then that woman is certainly not "good woman".

yes I am a guy
lets put it this way

一個女人唔會因為任性而比人話佢係衰女人
但係一個男人會因為唔responsible而比人話佢係衰男人

作者: 邊少 時間: 2009-3-4 15:34

also what I meant is, guys will stay for the marriage maybe only for their responsibilites even without love

but women do not have that kind of responsibilites/mind to stay for the marriage if no more love

作者: rainbow-davie 時間: 2009-3-4 15:51

原帖由 mcjohnjohn 於 2009-3-4 02:20 發表

數毛毛? 好浪漫啊~
同數星星有異曲同弓之妙~

數毛毛? how about 數蝌蚪?

作者: rainbow-davie 時間: 2009-3-4 15:52

原帖由邊少於 2009-3-4 16:32 發表

yes I am a guy
lets put it this way

一個女人唔會因為任性而比人話佢係衰女人
但係一個男人會因為唔responsible而比人話佢係衰男人

is 邊少好男人?

作者: 邊少 時間: 2009-3-4 15:55

I don't think I am one
叫得咩少都風流成性架啦

作者: rainbow-davie 時間: 2009-3-4 16:15

風流少男?

作者: B仔 時間: 2009-3-4 16:18

風流小豆

作者: rainbow-davie 時間: 2009-3-4 16:30

風流小豆? his two 小豆 are very 風流?

作者: 布小熊 時間: 2009-3-4 17:11

原帖由邊少於 2009-3-4 03:55 PM 發表
I don't think I am one
叫得咩少都風流成性架啦

no wor... my cat is called "Mick 少" but he is neutered. hee hee

作者: B仔 時間: 2009-3-4 17:29

原帖由 rainbow-davie 於 2009-3-4 17:30 發表
風流小豆? his two 小豆 are very 風流?

啱你食？ LOOOOOOL

作者: B仔 時間: 2009-3-4 17:30

原帖由 布小熊 於 2009-3-4 18:11 發表

no wor... my cat is called "Mick 少" but he is neutered. hee hee

切咗就冇得風流，可主意BOR～ HOHOHO

作者: rainbow-davie 時間: 2009-3-4 19:09

風流邊少無小邊?

作者: Purpleheart 時間: 2009-3-4 21:06

我明喇~所以男人好多時好遲先會決定結婚, 係因為男人對結婚呢樣野比女人睇得更重, 所以好多野都會考慮清楚

女人, 由於一直都會對結婚有幻想, 而且青春有限, 或許會衝動結婚~ (當然有例外) 因此, 一但發現婚後性格不合便會想離婚... 始終女人總是瞳憬幸福既~

作者: mcjohnjohn 時間: 2009-3-4 21:19

原帖由 rainbow-davie 於 2009-3-5 11:09 發表
風流邊少無小邊?

當然冇小"邊"啦!
你當邊少係流架! 叫得做邊少, 就梗係"邊邊"有力!

只有大邊, 絕無小邊!

作者: tofu 時間: 2009-3-4 22:36

"""我覺得如果為左「係時候結婚而結婚」的人既關係會比「因愛對方而結婚」脆弱得多，嫁錯／娶錯機會係大好多"""

I think it is depends on how mature is that person.  I know some friends who got married, b/c they wanted to find partners for the rest of their life.  so they picked the one that they can live with.  since that person is not the one they deeply love.  so they can give the other half more freedom and less jealous.  more "room" for each other.

love the one that you can't live without, marry the one that you can live with ---less pain

"""我明喇~所以男人好多時好遲先會決定結婚, 係因為男人對結婚呢樣野比女人睇得更重, 所以好多野都會考慮清楚"""

i believe they just don't want to loss their freedom.  also they can have child in their late 40s or even 50s, so why hurry to get marry wor

i think there is no unsolvable problem, it just depends on how much effort are you willing to imput.
if you decide to leave a person, you can just use whatever excuse.

作者: rainbow-davie 時間: 2009-3-4 23:00

原帖由 Purpleheart 於 2009-3-4 22:06 發表
我明喇~所以男人好多時好遲先會決定結婚, 係因為男人對結婚呢樣野比女人睇得更重, 所以好多野都會考慮清楚

女人, 由於一直都會對結婚有幻想, 而且青春有限, 或許會衝動結婚~ (當然有例外) 因此, 一但發現婚後性格不 ...

錯!!! 係男人明知果個係個tum, 好似泥沼咁, 一去難返, 理知既時候梗係會慢慢考慮啦.

作者: giginium 時間: 2009-3-4 23:22

原帖由 kayllis 於 2009-3-4 01:51 發表
erm.. what do you mean by 貨不對辦?

哈哈...如從來未見過落妝後個樣...第一次見到嚇親...

作者: giginium 時間: 2009-3-4 23:27

原帖由 ricrick 於 2009-3-4 02:06 發表

所以我讚成同居

我都贊成, 因為人的容忍度係又限.

作者: giginium 時間: 2009-3-4 23:33

原帖由小叻於 2009-3-4 09:46 發表
應該交往一段長時間先結婚~ 我唔太睇好拍拖一兩年就結婚個D囉~

一兩年都未睇清楚? 要扮野一個禮拜就話容易je...要扮一兩年都幾困難wo..

作者: Ultraman 時間: 2009-3-5 09:39

I also think 同居 could be a very good "pre-wedding" progress for serious couples to try out whether they can really work together before getting married. However, they have to face some possible consequents such as, object by their parents (bigger change on the gal's side); in case they can't work out, then should they keep the progress to live with another potential partner over and over again until success? Then other people (their families, relatives and friends...) might think they're just too open minded to live with someone easily.

If your parents, brothers and/or sisters have different personality, different interest, different taste of food, different habit ..... to you, or even make you angry sometimes, but you know they deeply love you inside their hearts, they also try to cheer you and care you whenever you need..., would you be that mean and picky to them and choose to hate them or even to move out? I also agree, if you can treat your serious other half as one of your family member, chance of working out would be a lot greater.

作者: Manlau 時間: 2009-3-5 11:59

If really nothing more can help a relationship, I agreed that divorce is not a bad choice. After all, people made mistakes and need a chance to re-start one more time instead of suffering the whole life. However, before people even think about divorce, they should really ask themselves: Is it that I really don't love him/her any more? Is there anything I can do better to save the relationship? Am I really doing everything right and best for the relationship (not just myself)? Marriage is really about building a team. So put in some effort!

作者: sunsing 時間: 2009-3-12 04:37 標題: 愛佐就要責任到底

呢個社會無對與錯，只有是否真心，兩個人咯生活系需要包容同關懷咯！

作者: Catpiano 時間: 2009-3-18 16:28

How to define 嫁錯郎／娶錯  ??

Who knows ..  if 嫁/娶 another one will be better?

I still beleive ..  almost everything/problem .. can solve ...  just the matter or try or not.

作者: tck 時間: 2009-3-19 19:11

try your best when you are with your gf if not work out then don't waste your time

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