Nam

後生個陣都一段時間好恨嫁， 驚30歲嫁唔出！
但係隨住年紀越大，越覺得無咩所謂， 反而想再遲多幾年，多啲錢先結婚！ 以前個年代成日話女人30嫁唔出係爛茶楂，但係以前嘅女人都多數靠男人先生存到，依㗎保養得好，真係唔係太大問題，如果問我嫁早啲有咩好，我諗會係生細路仔後康復快啲！當然無論以前或依㗎，double income 點都好過single income！  好多朋友都會問我幾時結婚，男朋友啲朋友批死我哋出年結，但係我真係覺得自己未ready，可能個重心放咗係事業上掛? 細個好想有個好靚嘅婚禮， 但依㗎多少會係俾父母一個交代，唔想大搞，搞咁大個show, 不如將啲錢儲起買樓好過！

Nam

回復 18# Lik

As far as I know with today technology, the deadline 30 is no longer the deadline. It just having a baby before 30 is easier to recover based on friends' experience.

The biological clock is around 39 I think...  A lot of my friends, including my sister in law had her baby at 35 and she is fine.  And I'm not sure if I want a kid... I don't want to have a kid just because everybody have a kid... I'm not ready to give up my career for a child yet...so ... still deciding...

Nam

Lo-Pak,

I think you misunderstood my concern.  I'm lucky to have to chance to witness a mom point of view. From having a baby, to raise a baby and babysit a baby. So I know what I need to expect phyiscally and mentally to be a mom.  I just don't want to be irresponsible, just have a baby, for the sake of it's about time.  

I'm lucky to understand the frustration of wanting a baby because of biological clock as one of my close friend is 39 and she is willing to be a single mom, she just want a baby...doesn't matter if her bf is not mature enough to be a dad....

I'm a very traditional woman.... if I have a child, I cannot stand myself always OT, taking classes, always on the run.  I cannot stand hiring a nanny to take care of my child as i see it is my responsibility....... so... I need to think it over carefully... but for sure, I know I'm not ready yet, not now.

Nam

Ask your boyfriend whether he is willing to be a stay-at-home dad if taking care of a child is wha ...
raffaello 發表於 2011-7-29 18:30

My boyfriend doesn't want a kid, it's not 100% but he prefer not to has a kid. At least not now.

So once in awhile, we had this discussion because he wants to make sure I'm on the same page and if I want a kid, we have to prepare for it.

He said ever since he was 7, he is surround by kidssss and he is 36 now and still surround by kids. (He is the youngest in the family and his mom had 8 child...)


So both he and I are experienced to take care of child and know what to expect.
Whenever he asked me if I want a child, I just don't have an answer for him.  His friend said right now, I'm too focus on school and work.  Maybe few years later, I will change.


As for age of parents, my mom and dad had me when my mom was 36 and had my older brother when she was 30.  haha, other than I was weak when I was a baby girl, I don't see I have much health problem....

So assume we won't have kid in future, I work extra hard lately and save money for investment.  I asked few mom who had kids, or those who convinced me to have kid, why they think I should have one.  The answer mostly are when we get old, we have a child to take care of us and spend time with us.   But look at today kids, how many of them really care of their parents. Maybe it is common in our generation... but if having a kid is a secured future retirement.    I found that is very selfish.  I would want nothing from my kid if I ever have one. I just wish them have a happy, healthy life...