Your 演技 is far from perfect.
You confessed here, which already increase the chance of getting caught.
You confessed here because you need to release your secrete to some unknown people, so you can balance your mind, which means you are not really into the "acting"
If it's perfect, you can even convince yourself that going to professional school is exactly and only what you want.
But what you are doing is not the RIGHT way to solve problem, you should know that at the bottom of your heart. You are just trying to escape from facing it directly.